YM returns

Last year I broke up with Young Man (YM) because, well, he was too young! He is very immature and needed to do some growing. I told him I'd still be friends but he passed up that offer. I was pretty sure at the time he was interested in another girl and that is why he was acting the way he was and pretty much ran as soon as I told him things didn't seem to be working out.

A few months ago (mid-March) he contacted me with the following email:

Hi myname,
My name is (insert his first AND last name here). I'm not sure if you remember me, but we dated last year. When our relationship ended you said that you wanted to maintain our friendship, and stated that I could contact you if I needed anything.
If you would prefer me to not contact you, it's no problem at all. Please let me know in a clear manner that you would like me not to contact you anymore and I won't ever contact you again.
With that being said, I was wondering if you would mind if I attended the church you brought me to when we were dating? I'd like to start going back to church, and that's the only one I know of in the area. If you would feel uncomfortable with that, or if it would cause any issues for you, it's no problem, I'll try to find another one. I didn't want to just show up there one day without checking with you first in case it would cause any problems.
Best Regards,
first name

I found it quite hilarious. And I responded as such:

Hi YM,
You crack me up. Of course I remember you. For heaven's sake, I slept with you. Not like many guys out there get that privilege. LOL.
I meant it when I said I would maintain our friendship and you could contact me. I don't say things I don't mean. But since we've both experienced people treating us unjustly and dishonorably, I understand your hesitation.
Of course you are welcome to attend my church. (insert details about church). So if you'd like me to introduce you around, I can do that. Or, if you'd rather just remain anonymous for a bit, I understand that as well.
Take care,
my name


And so the friendship began. He came to church and would email me every so often. He started inviting me to his motorcycle group meeting (the social hour after riding) - especially after he found out I got my motorcycle license but not a bike yet. He's emailed me various things that are going on about town and such.

I'm not positive he is interested in me more than a friend, but I'm not positive he's not, either. It's never easy for me to read people and perhaps, he's just lonely and let's face it, I'm a nice person. I rarely tell anyone to take a hike.

So this weekend was his birthday. And, on Friday I told him if he had no plans, we should do something special. I mentioned a couple of things, including hiking. So, that's what we did on Saturday. The world's greatest puppy loved it. We could have gone twice as far, I think, and she would have still had energy. But, with a bum foot, I felt like we went too far. After we got some subs, that he wouldn't let me pay for (I had planned to because it was his birthday). Then we came back to my place and chatted (I iced my then aching foot).

He made no moves on me and had to leave after a bit because he was meeting his buddies out for a birthday celebration. So in all, it seemed quite platonic.

My Boo came home in the middle of things. She later asked me what was up. I told her we were hanging as friends and she said it rarely works. I told her how me and my ex that she adores still hang out and she said, "that's because he is cool!" She really cracks me up!

I know she is young and has trouble with such things. But then again, she is pretty astute. So, we'll see how it goes. I really have no feelings left for YM. He seems like he was a lifetime ago...especially compared to PJ. It always comes back to him and I fear always will. No one can measure up. The bastard!

Any way, life is at least somewhat interesting, if nothing more. Time to make the donuts.

Really? I mean Really!

So here's the latest in the PB saga.

Last week he texts me on Monday around 3:30 or so in the afternoon. He wrote,"do you have plans for tonight?" I replied that normally I play volleyball but since I was still nursing my hurt foot, I was going to stay off the court for the evening so I had nothing planned. He wrote back asking if I wanted to get together. I said sure, "what do you have in mind?" He replied (and I'm sure you can guess it, if you've been following his normal behavior pattern) "nothing yet, but i guess it would have to be sedentary (lol). Is there a movie you want to see?" I wrote back that I hadn't seen Iron Man 2 yet. His reply, "I haven't seen 1 or 2."

So now we take a pause....really? what was he trying to communicate to me here? That since he hadn't seen the first one, he didn't want to see the second one? That since he hadn't seen the second one, that would work? What should my reply be? "Do you still want to see it?" Did he expect me to tell him all the places it was playing? Was he expecting me to offer up another movie?

Any way, I didn't reply. Someone came into my office, interupted me and I forgot the whole conversation. Later, when I was home, I realized that he never elaborated. I finally got a text from him at 7:30 that said, "hello?" I mean seriously, what did he expect? Does he really expect me to believe he is the least bit interested in me? I don't get it. He is good looking, but not the type of guy that I'd expect women to fawn over and jump when he suggests getting together. Why is there such a lack of effort on his part and does he seriously think I'm going to pick up his slack? Ha! I'm not even sure why he bothers to keep asking me out.

The next day he asks if we wanted to get together. I had other plans, so I said no. On Thursday, he emails to let me know he is going out of town for the weekend and wanted to know if we could do something this week. I'm headed out of town so I told him that won't work for me.

I'm not sure why I don't just tell him not to bother to call any more. I guess because really he isn't too annoying and at least we have a good time when we get together. And maybe, because I can't figure him out, I'm just a bit intrigued by him. But, really, not that interested.

Yearning

I wanted to talk
But I didn’t call
I couldn’t bear you to be there
But not there at all

I wanted to hold you
To reach out and touch
To tell you I need you
And love you so much.

I wanted beg you
To come back to me
To give it a chance
To set yourself free.

I wanted to talk
But I didn’t call
Unable to walk
Is it better to fall?

Crappy Day

I got stomped in soccer today. Not figuratively - literally. Young girl stomped on my foot and I think she broke the top of my foot. It could just be "bruised" which, in that part of my foot, according to my (medical genius) sister, is just as bad. Luckily I have crutches from the last time one of klutzes us got hurt so I can hobble about. But I won't be able to mow the lawn or do the remaining bits of housework.

I feel bad for the girl that stomped me. I know she felt bad and I didn't do much to let her know it's not a big deal and she should just let it go. You play a contact sport and getting hurt is just one of the risks you take. She was playing unsportsman like or anything. We were just in close quarters and her monster foot found mine (she was tall, thus the monster feet).

I guess the bad stuff that happened today, when I got lost going to Paul's place, that made me have a break down and leave, was very fortuitous because I got most of the housework done when I came back home. Of course, I'm not quite sure how the getting rear ended fits into my day of hell but it was good I was there to protect the motorcycle from the lady that hit me. That's my silver lining and I'm sticking with it!

I can't bare the thought of the emergency room on a Saturday afternoon/evening, so I'll wait to see how the foot is in the morning. I have a bottle of water and a puppy that loves me. Oh, and my BFF just called. She will come keep me company...that means I can have some wine to comfort me, too. :)

Let's hope tomorrow is better. K? K!